The Smallest Space Cadet of Them All, and his friend who is visiting from London are aged seven or so, and have just discovered the virtues of certain words, and concepts. One of particular fascination, and one that is unlikely to fade fast is the word "penis". Being a scientific term, it is permissible to use, but none the less jolly funny.
Having said that, when the SSCOTA and his friend asked me - "Do birds have penises, Daddy?", I was slightly taken aback. Well, I tried to give an honest answer, as far as I could remember, there is only really one class of bird that does have a penis, which is the ducks. (I did lot of zoology at university where I studied genetics, which is where I picked up this kind of esoteric fact about the love life of animals.) The others have make do with a small opening called a cloaca, which doesn't sound that thrilling, but who knows?
A quick Google turned up two interest facts, which is that both ducks and ostriches in fact have penises in the bird kingdom, but also another fact. The duck is an exceptionally well endowed creature, with the Argentine Lake Duck being rather spectacular with a 40cm Johnson, rather larger in fact than the rest of the duck.
The National Geographic (See! Penis is an acceptable word if the irreproachably serious minded National Geographic can mention it.) in its coverage mentions more about the duck.
"The Argentine lake duck is a stiff-tail duck; its tail feathers spike upward and its legs are set far back on its body. The bird is extremely clumsy on land and spends most of its time in the water."
How surprising is that? If I had to drag my meat and two veg along the ground behind me I might be very clumsy on land, and highly inclined to spend time in the water, and even then I might be a tad nervous about the odd hungry pike cutting my reproductive career short...
Nature is not only stranger than we do suppose, but perhaps stranger than we can suppose.
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